Women at Rest

Complain Less, Enjoy More

There's a good article over on MSNBC called Stressed Out, talking about how our addiction to busyness has led us to equate stress with success. The busier our lives, the more in demand we are, the stronger our sense of value and importance. It's more than six years since I left Microsoft, but I still vividly remember participating in Who's More Stressed (i.e. important) oneupmanship.

Of course I've done it since, too! Sometimes during periods of hard legitimate stress (caretaking someone who's dying, grieving a death, battling addiction) -- sometimes during piddly self-induced stress (stuff not happening on my timetable, overcommitting, sitting on the pity pot).

Earlier this year I decided to try a little experiment. I decided to stop talking about being busy and stressed, and banished the following words and phrases from my vocabulary:

1. Too busy
2. Don't have time
3. Stressed out
4. Figure out and/or Figure it out
5. Running around
6. Frantic
7. Hectic
8. I'm sorry for not getting back to you sooner but...

Some still creep in now and then, but that's OK -- progress, not perfection, is what matters.

Since this wasn't a documented experiment I can't pony up measurable results, but I can tell you this: Rarely do I feel frantic or overwhelmed at work anymore, even now during our "busiest" time of year. I continue to avoid those words and phrases like the plague, because I've seen how living without them is better. My attitude has a lot to do with how I perceive, handle and experience work and life.

Dr. Leslie Reisner, an expert on stress management cited in the MSNBC article, says the very act of complaining about stress can make your life feel more stressful. She suggests practicing not complaining about stress for one week. Why not give it a try? See what happens. Share it here, if you like!

Isn't it nice to be invited to not do something for a change? :)

Harvey Mackay once said something simple and profound that pops into my head at least once a day. He said, "Don't water your weeds."

Paint the Sky

"God is my favorite artist."~Gwen

(Photo by anarkistix.)

Mental Hygiene & The Media

More than ever, my mind needs moderation when it comes to the media. Few things spin me into hopelessness, despair and rage than the news and I've found I don't need to seek it out in order to stay well-enough informed.

Months ago I turned off the Today show for good, and since Bob Edwards left Morning Edition I rarely listen to NPR except on Sundays. (I love Car Talk and This American Life, and I secretly want to marry Scott Simon.) I never watch local or national news, although several times a day I check MSNBC online and wish I could cut back to once a day or even less. I avoid political blogs, except for The Unbearable Bobness of Being which is a treat to read. I faithfully watch The Daily Show and The Colbert Report. I like my reality served with humor! When I go on retreat and am cut off from news, I experience tremendous relief. My spiritual director says whenever I feel relief, that's God's will for me.

That's what I need to pay attention to.

At one retreat, Camille Maurine said to us, "Treat your personal space as a sanctuary." (I use this quote on my boundaries candle.) This most definitely includes our minds. I need to remember to treat my mind with care. Gorging on negativity is as unhealthy to the body as gorging on fast food. Once in a while is OK, but as a steady diet it's deadly. I'm gonna try to treat my mind well today.