"Your soul knows the geography of your destiny. Your soul alone has the map of your future, therefore you can trust this indirect, oblique side of yourself. If you do, it will take you where you need to go, but more important it will teach you a kindness of rhythm in your journey."
The good news: It's not cancer. Thank God. Even though the results support my, and the vet's, intuition, I'm still vastly relieved.
The strange news: It was something called mucinosis, a common affliction in Shar Peis, extremely rare in other breeds. True, Silas eats rice daily and has a black spot on his tongue, but even with his mysterious past I'm relatively certain he's not Chinese.
So, tomorrow we'll go back to the vet. He'll get checked and re-bandaged, and I'll get a chance to find out more. Could be a symptom of hypothyroidism, could be a one-time oddity. We shall see. I'm just extremely grateful it's nothing serious, because the strain and stress so soon after Lucy's passing would quickly wipe us both out.
I read a quote by Byron Katie this morning that hit home:
If you want real control, drop the illusion of control. Let life live you. It does anyway.
Yes. Today I will show up, relax, and let life live me.
Still, what I want in my life is to be willing to be dazzled — to cast aside the weight of facts
and maybe even to float a little above this difficult world. I want to believe I am looking
into the white fire of a great mystery. I want to believe that the imperfections are nothing — that the light is everything — that it is more than the sum of each flawed blossom rising and fading. And I do.